Yes!

 " I'm a guitar freak. I love me some rock-n-roll guitar" 

Chaka Khan

And speaking of guitars:

ANOTHER video I can relate to:

"I start shaking, I get night sweats, I start having panic attacks, it affects me to the point where I can't even mentally focus" - that quote was from one of the people in this video.

ALL of those things pertain to me! Thank you, so-called FAMILY!

I don't believe in HEALING! Talking to some therapist or doing yoga( gag me with a spoon) isn't going to make it away. I'm always going to be broken.....

When will I get it through my head, that NO ONE in this family gives a damn about me!

When I was a child, I was crying alone but nobody cared....

Alternative blackness part 2!

 Most people in the black "community" BULLY each other, it's always something....

HopeLESS!

 I was bullied by my family and the kids at school, and in the neighborhood.... nobody came to my rescue.

And no one ever will.....

I DEFINITELY identified with these youtube comments that I read, made by a couple of people:

"As a child, my interactions with adults only occurred when they had to scold me, yell at me, and make fun of me."

(Sometimes they would ask me what do I want to eat or what do I want for Christmas, etc., but for the most part, I can still relate to the above statement)

"I have never had deep or long-lasting relationships and I am wary of every kind gesture. People disgust me. I am a human being ruined by evil imbeciles."

"My childhood was filled with neglect, emotional abuse. I'm filled with quiet rage most of the time, like literally hating everyone and everything."

"I go to bed every night hoping I don't wake up and that I can stay in the land of escapism."

Flora Purim - That's What She Said

 What you know about this?

Alternative blackness..

 People like to say "Black people are NOT a monolith".... but there are things that TOO MANY people in the "black community" do that get on my last nerve, and the last thing  I wanna do is fit in! 

For instance, I almost watched some youtube rant video about the tv show, Insecure- which I never watched, I decided to read some of the comments and someone mentioned Awkward Black Girl, never watched that either, then some knucklehead responded and mentioned some nonsense about how ALL ADOS girls he grew up with were among other things- confident, funny, and could dress. Okay, what the HELL is "could dress" -see, that's the kind of crap I'm talking about, all of us don't dress the same(thank goodness) and those girls were probably always messing with somebody to destroy THEIR confidence. 

And another thing that I can't stand about my damn community is this constant multi-generational urge to call others corny. Last week, I was reading comments on a video that I don't wanna get into, but anyway some waste of space wrote that Michael Jackson got corny by the time the Pepsi commercial came out and that "we", the community were all laughing at his hair being burned. What kind of sadistic scum laughs at that?

And Michael Jackson or Prince, for that matter were NEVER corny, they were a lot more interesting and intelligent than most brothers I run into. Seems like to me, the people who usually get called corny are the ones who have the balls to be DIFFERENT.... sometimes things like love & romance & making the world a better place get called corny by the community.

Forget "decentering men" how about decentering the community!

Exactly....

 

Underrated Chaka Khan jam....

 

More of me - part 2